Letting go: Proud of who he is

(Note: This was written a week ago so the amount of time left has significantly changed.)

3 weeks. 21 days. 288 hours. As I entered my son's 4^th grade classroom, I was very aware that time was running out. My heart was full. Then my daughter's math teacher engaged me in a teaching moment just because of who she is. My son's teacher welcomed me into the classroom.

My 9 year old son stood up in front of his class and presented his “Star of the Week” speech about himself. He was to share 8 items, 8 ideas about who he is. This was not going to be just any speech. 

My high energy, outgoing son was nervous (he said later his knees were shaking and he couldn't talk any louder).  So no, he wasn't the most fluent speaker but tears began to well up in my eyes.  Because as my boy presented it came out loud and clear.  He was proud. Proud of who he is. A missionary kid (MK). A Third Culture Kid (TCK).  And maybe one day he will give a speech on what that means. But today he just shared a glimpse of that.

1. A Canada flag.
2. An Ethiopian flag.
3. A brown leather soccer ball made in Ethiopia.
4. A plastic tree. Because he climbs trees every month of the year.
5. A roll of injera. Favorite food.
6. Toy tortoise. Kufkuf his tortoise is in Ethiopia.
7. Gumuz necklace. Already worn 780 days.
8. Action Bible. Reads everyday.

He read his notes slowly but he shared a glimpse of his life. This is who he is. A boy who loves the Lord, loves his Canadian friends but also loves living in Ethiopia. This brought tears to my eyes and my heart was ripping in two. 

His ability to move between cultures is a gift.  Few kids his age get the chance to try that.  To live in a national geographic magazine.  But my son doesn't have a choice.  He does it because we do it.  It also means that he is not living the “normal” life that most 9 year old Canadian boys live.

My heart throbbed for a boy who thrives in a classroom with other kids.  I ponder the future.  He lives in the moment. And I wonder: Does my son even know that he is different?

Then, the children in the classroom listed why my son was a star. What made him special? What surprised me was how fast the answers came. They came from the hearts of kids he has seen this summer. And kids he has spent only 7 days with in school. 7 days.

The very first comment was this: I want to live in Ethiopia. (Really? My son has shown you that it is cool to live in another culture. I love that. It shows he is happy with who he is and happy where he is going.)   An awesome friend.....kind....takes care of his friends....full of energy....enthusiastic....athletic.....cool...

Tears dripped down my nose. Down my cheeks. My son has been blessed.

Blessed by friendship. Blessed to be able to love others.

Although my heart is heavy for my son, my heart is also glad.

No my son won't engage in multiple sports. He'll play soccer.  He'll know how to shoot Gumuz arrows.  He won't sit beside classmates.  He'll sit by his sisters. He won't build snow forts.             He'll build stick forts. He won't sit in a lunchroom. He'll sit with his family or roast chicken over a small fire.

He's learnt that language is a necessarily tool for communication. He's learnt that housing for some people is only a shelter. He's learnt that the neighbour kids are hungry. All the time. He's learnt that clothes can be worn until they are shredded.

He won't grow up to be a typical kid. He'll be a third culture kid. He'll probably struggle to settle down in one place and call it home. He'll probably be great at making friends wherever he goes.

He might not make strong ties with anyone.

He's proud to be a 3^rd culture kid now. I'll be praying for him the rest of his life. That he will embrace the present and be proud of his past. That God will use him more and not less because of who he is.

And I will pray the same for our 4 girls.  They will each have their own story.  My hope is that it will be one that will shape them into godly women who know how to forgive and know how to love deeply.