A Daughter's Worth: Wealth or Blessing? (March 2016)

“Five children? (Gleeful laughter.) Four daughters? Oh. Only 1 son? You must have more children.” These words have been spoken to me over and over since my arrival in Gesses 5 years ago. Over and over again, I have spoken of the deep blessing each of my girls is to me, that they have been created equally by God the Creator. Over and over again, I am told to birth more boys. Many of my closest Gumuz friends have a bunch of girls. There is a sigh of dismay when I am told the news. It's another girl.

 Although a girl's birth is not honored she IS considered to have value. After all, girls are a father's possession; part of his wealth, along with his cows, goats, and grain. Everyone knows that the father can use one of his daughters to pay off a debt.  And when it's time for her brother to get married, he trades her to the brother of his future wife.   (Sister exchange marriage).

Within 10 years a Gumuz girl is capable of a grown woman's workload. They can carry 2 large jerricans of water, heavy loads of wood or grain for 10km, grind grain on a stone for hours, cook, cultivate, plant, weed, harvest and thresh by hand. She is an immense blessing to her mother as they work alongside each other.

Last week, I walked into the village and rescued an 11 year old girl from a hostage situation. When her mother (a dear friend of mine) came with the news, I knew that I had no choice but to get involved. In fact, we were already involved. Her father has been working for Rolf to pay his debt for several months. I had spoken with him often about his daughter's blessing and his role as protector and father.

Her father and Rolf were a 4 hour drive away and I had no phone service, so in prayer I strode across the road, through the village and to the grass hut where she was sitting guarded. I told the guard that if someone asked about the girl, they could come and talk to me. I took her by the hand and we walked home. No one stopped me.

As I passed the local teahouse, I cried out against their culture. “How long Oh Lord, before these people, whom I love, let go of the evil in their culture? When will the fathers stand up to protect their daughters? When will the elders of the village love their daughters? O Lord have mercy on these people who are bound for judgement.” I am not always this dramatic but it was 40C (105F), I was hot, tired and defenseless. 

An hour later, I was not surprised to find the chief and 2 community elders at my door. My girls and our rescued girl were busy crocheting and the Lord filled me with peace and passion. We spoke for 2 hours.

We occasionally have opportunities to engage with community leaders regarding cultural practices. They are unbending. A debt must be paid. If you don't have animal or monetary wealth, you pay with your daughter. Then, there is instantly peace. No one is murdered and there is no revenge. But this “peaceful” cultural practice has produced girls and women who harbour deep hurt and anger.

I spoke boldly. I think they were amused. Fine you can keep her until her father gets back but then he needs to pay his debt. Stale mate. Their hearts are so hard.

Two days later, my husband (who is very fond of his wife - me and his 4 daughters, along with his son) stood up in the court case and spoke out against the payment of daughters.  He said, "They are NOT your wealth, they are not goats or cattle.  They are a blessing. They are to be loved and protected by the men in their lives."  His words were many and they weren't even amused. 

Speak and act as those who are going to be judged by the law that gives freedom, because judgment without mercy will be shown to anyone who has not been merciful.  Mercy triumphs over judgment.  James 2:12-14

All they wanted was the payment of the cows.  Now.  No mercy. 

"He has shown you, Oh man, what is good.  And what does the Lord requires of you?  To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God."  Micah 6:8

We continue to pray that the hearts of the chiefs and elders will be softened.  There are a few.  We pray that the women will stand up against the evil done to them.  There are more.  We pray that one day, the Gumuz girls will be valued as God the Father values them....as His children.